Toes in the River

The last three months have flown by, I can't quite believe how fast the time is going. Yet, at the same time, I still struggle to come to terms with the fact that I'm in Ecuador. Not in a bad way, but for months Cuba and Costa Rica had been the plan and so I that's what I was mentally prepared for and then boom! With a week's notice I'm living in Quito, Ecuador.

I can't possibly tell you everything about the last three months, but I will do my best!

When I first arrived in Quito, on the 6th of February, it was for Latin Link's International Assembly, an occasion which takes place every 4 years where the whole Latin Link community comes together in fellowship to share, learn and make decisions about the future of the mission.

It was a wonderful opportunity to meet Latin Linkers from all across Latin America and Europe, people who I'd only met over email, and also reconnect with some familiar faces, such as my orientation amigas! It was a lovely way to start my time in Latin America, even if I did have two year's worth of luggage with me as opposed to just a week's like everyone else! One of the highlights of the week was having the time to spend some time alone with God in His Word and in prayer and knowing in a very special way that, although I had no idea of what lay ahead, that He was with me, holding my hand all the way and that He was the one who was going to get me to Cuba. One passage in particular was:

"Thus says the LORD, who makes a way in the sea, a path in the mighty waters... “Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. The wild beasts will honor me, the jackals and the ostriches, for I give water in the wilderness, rivers in the desert, to give drink to my chosen people, the people whom I formed for myself that they might declare my praise."

Isaiah 43:16-21

I had a couple of meetings throughout the week regarding Cuba, and the Lord was so faithful in providing me with scriptures to share and with words to say. Nothing was resolved but it was helpful to discuss the issues together and ask some questions. The other major highlight of the assembly, which I know was a highlight for most other people as well, was the times of musical worship that we shared together. At times, there were four languages being sung simultaneously: English, German, Spanish and Portugese. It was a perfect picture of the unity that we have in Christ and our love for him, despite being from different cultures and speaking different languages; Christ overcomes any and every barrier.

After the assembly had finished, I moved into with my host family and began spanish school. I was really worried at first that I was going to start at the school and realise how rubbish my spanish was, but thankfully it was nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be and I came out of my first lesson feeling encouraged rather than discouraged. I did manage to have my phone stolen on the bus that first week, but apart from that everything went really well. I continued having a three hour lesson in the afternoon Mon-Fri and was continually encouraged as the Lord enabled my learning and my spanish continued to improve at a rate I don't think I had expected! I think it was a praise point in almost all of my prayer updates at the time. I finished doing full-time language study about a month ago, but continue to go in once a week for a two hour lesson so I can keep learning. I am so grateful for my spanish; it's still nowehere near perfect but I can now understand almost all of what is being said (depending on whose speaking and what we're talking about!) and I can express myself. For most of my life I have found language really amazing, and have dreamed of being bilingual and so for me being able to speak spanish is more than just being able to live in Latin America, and so I'm continually praising God for this gift which He has given to me.

In the couple of months that I was at language school full-time, I also had the opportunity to have some other adventures, including a trip to Laguna de Quilotoa which is a lake inside an old volcano. We walked down to the lake side to get a better look at the bright blue water (an effect of the sulphur from the volcano, I think) which takes about half an hour, took a rest and had something to eat and then began the steep ascent back to the top. The lake surface is 3500m above sea level and then to get back to the top is another 280m which takes usually between 1 and 2 hours. You could actually feel the lack of oxygen! I've done a lot of walking in my time, and been up Arthur's Seat my share but this was something else. After walking (climbing) for 10 seconds I was breathing as if I had been running for 10 mins and my legs felt extremely achey. We did, however, eventually get back up to the top. When reflecting on the climb it reminded me of how life feels sometimes; like we're climbing our way up this massive slope, we can't even see the top, and everything is hurting. Everything inside us is telling us to stop and give up, that we can't do it, but we know the only way we're going to reach the top is to keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep going. The end will come eventually. And it does.

At the start of April, I eventually received the news I had been waiting for regarding Cuba. I got an email from LL's International Director which, among other things regarding Ecuador and Costa Rica, told me that LL did not feel able to offer me a placement in Cuba this year. The two reasons I was given were firstly continuing Pastor Delvis to have time to settle into the new church and community before receiving a Strider- I think he has asked for three months notice before- and also needing time to put appropriate mentorship in place, seeing as Hollie (other LL Cuba worker) and her husband will not be in Cuba. It was mentioned that this could potentially be from Costa Rica or Guatemala, suggesting that it might be possible for me to be in Cuba solo but that too is uncertain at the moment. LL have said they will continue looking into possibilities for next year. It was really tough at first, mainly because I didn't understand why this was happening or how it fitted with all the messages of encouragement regarding Cuba God had been giving me over the past months. I was totally confused, and didn't know how to feel or what to think. Did I give up on Cuba for the sake of avoiding more disappointment and hurt or did I choose to continue believing and hoping in the things the Lord had told me?
It was the week running up to Easter and so naturally I was thinking over the Easter story, when I found that I could connect with how the disciples must have been feeling at that time. They had spent three years with Christ, they had heard and believed all that he had told them and said to them, they knew he was the Messiah. And then Good Friday comes, Jesus is dead and all hope seems lost. They are lost. They had been so sure that this was the Saviour, and yet now he was dead. How could any of it make sense, where did they go from here? But then Sunday came, and the victory of Christ's resurrection with it.
In order for there to be a resurrection, there also has to be a death. Maybe the possibility of getting to Cuba is dead, but I have a God who is in the buisness of resurrection! Like the renewed strength spoken of in Isaiah 40, I felt Jesus pick me up and give me the strength to believe in God's promises again. 

"And we desire each one of you to show the same earnestness to have the full assurance of hope until the end, so that you may not be sluggish, but imitators of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises."

Hebrews 6:11-12

One of my favourite words in spanish is Esperar; one of it's meanings is "to hope" but it also means "to wait" and "to expect". Although it's inconvenient as a native english speaker to have only one word for these three things, I think it expresses what real Hope means perfectly. What is "to wait" but to have patience? And what is "to expect" but to have faith that something will happen? And so this is what I have chosen to do, to put behind me the fact I don't understand why it's happening this way, and choose to believe: to have patience, to have faith and to have hope.

Since then, and since having finished full-time study at langauge school, I have now started work with a church in Sangolquí, a town ten minutes away from where I've been living. The church is pastored by a british missionary family which is really nice for me, as I have people to talk in english with if I need to! I'm involved in:

• Helping out with the Jóvenes (young people) group, and I'm also giving a weekly singing class to some of them.
• Doing discipleship visits with some young women in/connected with the church
• Running a children's club on a Saturday morning
• Participating in the ladies meeting
• Some english tutoring/teaching

I'm really enjoying it so far and it's great to be building new relationships. It's challenging at times doing it all in spanish but God continues to enable me and I trust that I'm able to say what He wants me to. I'll continue working here for the remaining 11 weeks (eek!) I have until moving onto Costa Rica- if nothing changes that is! Truth is, I have no idea what God is doing or what He is going to do regarding Cuba, but He has brought me to a place of contentment in living where I am and in the plans we have for right now but also in the hope and promises He has given me.

One final thought to close. In my evening readings I'm currently in Joshua and last week I was in chapter three, when God is instructing Joshua in how they are to cross the River Jordan to enter the Promised Land, and I noticed something I hadn't before:

"And when the soles of the feet of the priests bearing the ark of the LORD, the Lord of all the earth, shall rest in the waters of the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan shall be cut off from flowing, and the waters coming down from above shall stand in one heap.”

Joshua 3:13

Instead of just having the people wait for Him to stop the waters while they were standing on dry land so that they were certain that it was safe and they could cross, God didn't stop the raging river until the very feet of the priests carrying the tabernacle were in the water. Sometimes when there is an obstacle in between us and something God has promised us or something He has told us to do, God requires us to keep walking forward and following Him in the faith that He will make a way, before He actually stops the water... even if He doesn't do it until the very last moment when our toes are in the river.